Episode Summary
Interpersonal communication is all about sharing emotions, thoughts, and ideas. When you think of communication, you instantly think of spoken language and the verbal exchange of information, but nonverbal communication is just as essential to get your point across.
In this episode of the Taking the Lead podcast, our host Christina Brady welcomes Rachel Cossar, the CEO & co-founder of Virtual Sapiens. They talk about the importance of body language and nonverbal communication, why listening is as vital as talking, and the key traits of great communicators.
Guest Profile
- Name: Rachel Cossar
- What she does: She's the CEO & co-founder of Virtual Sapiens.
- Company: Virtual Sapiens
- Noteworthy: Rachel is a leader in the field of nonverbal communication and leadership presence facilitation. As a former nationally-ranked athlete and professional ballet dancer, she has a knack for translating unique skills into relatable business skills and competencies.
Key Insights
- Nonverbal communication is as important as verbal communication. Your nonverbal communication skills are just as critical to the art of conversation as your verbal communication skills. How you act, react, and listen to a person helps establish trust and build connections. Rachel explains, "The fact of the matter is that so much like a critical amount of the nuance that we pick up on in communication and conversation comes from the way we're sharing words and the way we deliver words, and a lot of the underlying tenets of relationship building like trustworthiness and confidence and projecting authority and energy, it's almost exclusively non-verbal."
- Listening is half of the conversation. Good communication requires that all parties talk and listen. Rachel explains, "I think oftentimes in communications, very natural to be preoccupied with how we appear when we are speaking with so much of the way you build trust is in the way you show up as a listener and the way you show people that you are considering — doesn't have to be agreeing, doesn't have to be disagreeing, but just considering and listening to the other person."
- Great communicators are intentional and self-aware. Communication is much more complex than people think. So how can you become a better communicator? Rachel says, "A lot of people will be like, 'No, I crossed my arms because it's comfortable,' and I'm like, 'Yeah, the reason it's comfortable is because it incorporates self-touch, which is a pacifying behavior.' So if you're cold or you're in any way in need of comfort, crossing your arms feels good, and that's why, and that's fine. But again, thinking from the other person's perspective, it's different. It's different from holding yourself open. Maybe angling your body a little bit so that it's not as confrontational and then you're receiving people's ideas."
Episode Highlights
Nonverbal communication matters even in a video setting
“I think there’s a little bit of a transition people need to make in terms of recognizing that if someone is showing up on video, they’re giving you real time, and there’s a currency that is very valuable, that can be capitalized on, and nothing really complicated needs to happen, but making sure that the person can see as much of you as possible so that you’re not just a floating head, making sure that you’re well-lit so people can see your facial expressions.”
Always set clear expectations
“I think that, organizationally, leaders need to really be clear about expectation setting for meetings in general, and that’s similar to, like, okay, we’re having these in-person meetings. In this meeting, in particular, no one’s bringing their devices. This is a brainstorming meeting. We’re going to be using pen and paper, whatever. Or this is a video meeting, and it’s collaborative, and this is the only opportunity that we’ll all have to come together. Everyone’s going to be on video. We’ll keep it as short and efficient as possible, but we’re not here to waste people’s time.”
Technology can help build and improve skills
“We are training the models to understand what a human is and some of the different behaviors humans do. And then you build depending on the application, of course. It might be like, okay, now change the color, put a professional shirt on, whatever. Or it might be Rachel has her hand in front of her mouth, and she’s talking. Her posture is also compromised. We don’t like those behaviors. […] We want to build the human skills. We’re not here to replace, we’re here to be like, ‘Hey, like you are not going to atrophy in using our technology, you are going to build real skills.'”
